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Stop Over Apologizing By Trying These Phrases

As a society we have learned to say "I'm sorry" when we feel that we have wronged someone. We have now even began using this phrase to acknowledge even the smallest inconvenience such as bumping into someone, being a few minutes late or even asking for help. This phrase has been overused and has become a knee-jerk reaction for most.

Apologizing is a good way to acknowledge and take responsibility for something you did wrong but over doing it can be a sign of low self-esteem. Kelly Hendricks, psychologist, explained to Psych Central “Those who over-apologize often feel like a burden to others, as if their wants and needs are not important.”

Novelist, Caroline Leavitt, said over-apologizing was a defense mechanism she used to fend off a sense of blame. She said "For me, who always felt that any minute someone would be shouting at me or blaming me or mocking me, an apology delivered in advance could soften the blow, or even act like a stop signal."

Stop making your apology about you. We usually say "I'm sorry, I'm Late" but this phrase does not show concern for the other person's experience. Try a few of these recommended phrases from LifeHacker.com that show empathy for the other person.

When you must butt into a conversation instead of saying "I'm sorry to interrupt" try saying "I appreciate that thought, but what I wanted to say is …" Showing appreciation for someone to start off with can substitute for an apology.

On occasion, traffic issues can cause you to be late. Rather than saying, "I'm sorry, I'm late" try saying "Thank you for your patience, traffic was horrendous today."

If you have to ask someone to do a favor for you don't be shy, be direct. You can say "There's something I would appreciate your help with when you have a minute."

Swapping the word "sorry" for "thank you" is another way you can be receptive of a mistake you made without having to apologize. Go with a phrase that expresses gratitude like "thanks so much for pointing that out to me."

Own your mistakes, especially at work. If you did something wrong, don't apologize. Saying something like "I see what I did there. Let me get to work on fixing it." This way you are taking ownership of your wrong doing. There is no need to apologize when making a mistake.


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